He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize