i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
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he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
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I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
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