dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Best sex of my life. But I think it's because I like his apartment. Really nice bed sheets. High vaulted ceilings. I wanted to lay there forever.
You're getting old. Was it located in a nice school district for your future offspring?
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.