Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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