Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
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