thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Randomize
