Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
