I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Cold hands, warm shart.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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