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All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
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