So, I'm about to rent a movie, order pizza, and use my vibrator.... Am I dating myself?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
The power of my boobs compel you
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize