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how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
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