Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
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