i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
