its not stalking. its research.
I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
I woke up with a black eye and dim memories of announcing that i had super powers. I shoved my pockets full of canned tuna and tried to jump off the balcony. And then my boyfriend called the cops.
so you're not coming in to work today?
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Randomize
