spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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