we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
