Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
the recession has oofficially hit my standards.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
I'm not sure. I have to find the Greeks I was with last night and see if they can explain to me why I can't hear out of my right ear and why I look like I got the shit kicked out of me
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
