Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I just want him to come back from NOLA alive, without an arrest record or stripper glitter on his clothes...
Those seems like unreasonable expectations for a bachelor party honestly...
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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