who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
turns out a healthy dose of cleavage is the equivalent of a swig of felix felicis
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
