That's when you crack a 10am beer
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Dear Ex-Sister-in-Law, I never thought I would say this, but I just found your panties in my back seat. Please remind me to give them back.
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