If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
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We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
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I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
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