apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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