Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
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