i don't like sucking hair
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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