i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
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