I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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