Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
Randomize