I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
