i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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