David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
You asked the waitress for a vasectomy and handed her a butter knife, like you were ordering something from the menu
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I just found a bag of teeth...
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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