smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the room spins SO much faster in panama
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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