I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Randomize
