just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize