Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
