I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
she looked like the before picture.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
