i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
FUCK WHALES
Randomize
