Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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