Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
