I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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