No stitches, just platelets and will power
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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