I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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