I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
The Olympian is in my bed
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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