You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize