READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
