She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
