Sponge bath it is.
Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
Literally too hungover to clean. I'll get the frosting off the table tomorrow, ok?
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
