Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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