i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Randomize
