whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
