I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
