dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
we made out on top of his cat.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
