hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
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I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
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